When you judge, the main person being harmed is you. So learn to be ‘wisely selfish’, as the Dalai Lama would say.
Judgment of anything or anyone is, in effect, an attack on yourself, because it causes a sense of separation from your true nature. Once that happens, the natural flow of energy is blocked, which doesn’t feel good, and it limits you in every way.
Years ago, when I was listening to a Buddhist master teaching about the importance of non-judgment, a surprising sense of relief and peace came over me as I listened to him repeating over and over,
“Don’t judge, don’t judge, don’t judge, don’t judge.”
I felt as if more burden had been lifted from me when I set my intention to let go of judgment, although at the time, I couldn’t fully understand why that was.
By judging or rejecting anything, you send a message to your subconscious mind that you will be judged (in effect attacked), and that you are only going to accept yourself under certain circumstances. This immediately sets off the survivor instinct, and then, there you are, to some degree, out of the flow. When we are out of flow, we are in the process of creating more of the very thing that we are judging as wrong or bad.
One spiritual teacher, Jo Dunning put it well when she said, “If we are judging, we don’t have compassion in that situation, and it is telling the universe we need to experience more of it or similar, so we can develop compassion.”
Judgment vs discernment
There’s a common misperception that letting go of judgment means letting go of discernment, but this absolutely is not the case. By not judging the present moment as good or bad, right or wrong, it puts you in an empowered place to create positive change. It certainly doesn’t mean that what others are doing must always be tolerated, or that you shouldn’t do anything about it.
By first dropping judgment, and thereby allowing your own energy flow, you will be in the best possible position to effectively discern how to respond, and then take the most effective action, or non-action, as required.
Remember, the first person to drop judgment about is you.
Simple Reminders for Daily Life
- Become mindful and aware of how often you judge yourself. You may well be surprised when you begin to look more carefully.
- Notice your judgment of others as it comes into your mind and see if you can turn it into compassion. Don’t try to force compassion however, if it doesn’t come easily, just intend it.
- Don’t judge or criticise yourself for being judgmental, meet that with compassion also.
- Begin to take note of how much lighter you feel in yourself with less judgment on board.
- If letting go of judgment of yourself or others is a struggle, and it’s not happening easily, get in touch for a complimentary clarity call, and let me show you how to let everything come more easily
